Bob Sassone

Breaking News: Giant Grandma Attacks Family

Josh is right. What the hell is going on in the land of Family Circus? Genetic experiments? (Click on the pic for the full effect.)

Daniel Robert Epstein: 1975-2007

He passed away last weekend, only 31.

Check out the interviews he did over at Suicide Girls. It's rather breathtaking the amount of interviews he conducted and the names involved. Rob Corddry has a piece about Epstein at the site too.

Advice To Graduates

1. If someone says to you that your high school or college years will be the best of your life, run away from these people as fast as you can.

2. Save money.

3. Yes, your credit actually is important.

4. If you are never fired from a job, you probably won't be a success.

5. "I'm really not sure what to do next" is not a reason to go to graduate school.

6. Don't be one of those people who constantly talks about their grades, athletic success, or anything else that happened in school.

7. If you find yourself in jail, act crazy. The others will stay away from you.

8. Your parents aren't as bad as you think.

9. Working is usually better than not working.

10. To high school graduates: when you get to college, you will meet a lot of assholes. After college too.

11. Move out of your hometown. And if you need/want to stay in your hometown, live some place else first and then come back to it.

12. Dick Sargent was just as good as Dick York.

Happy Birthday To Me

Saturday was my birthday, and while I don't go crazy on my birthday anymore, I did have a very enjoyable weekend. Saturday night I had Mexican food and beer, then on Sunday I went to see Ocean's 13 (cool flick) and then had a big dinner of spaghetti and veal parm with garlic bread and wine. My stomach ached so much from overeating that for about an hour I thought a small yet tenacious alien was going to burst through.

As for my age, according to Douglas Adams I am the secret of the universe. I am Fox Mulder's apartment number. Someone once made a movie about my summer.

New! New! New!

New short story up at Professor Barnhardt's Journal, from Christian Stella.

Also, for about 15 minutes today, this blog had a completely different design. Then I changed it back. You didn't miss much.